Did you even know there was such a thing? Without getting too mechanical about it there is some science behind the way we become turned on. It’s similar between the sexes and we can be satisfied with different elements.
The key phases in what’s called the ‘sexual response cycle’……
1, Desire & Libido – the part where we feel ‘turned on’ occurs as a result of erotic physical and/or mental stimulation. We have an increase in heart and breathing rate, tension in the muscles and blood flow to the naughty bits. This results in swelling, lubrication and erection of the penis and vagina.
How can you help kick start this part? Getting ‘in the mood’ is sometimes the hardest part. Doing things to help you feel up for it could include simply relaxing, having a bath and switching off the mind from the day to day routine of life. Getting dressed up in sexy lingerie or an outfit you feel good in, or watching/reading something erotic all help stimulate the mind and help the excitement phase begin.
2, Arousal – now everything becomes intensified. The body responds with blood pumping to the sexual organs, the penis becomes longer and wider and the vagina becomes longer, wider and moist.
The woman’s clitoris becomes highly sensitive at this stage and can even be painful to touch, whilst the man’s testicles are withdrawn up into the scrotum.
This is the stage where touch is important either through masturbation or with a partner, we can start to enjoy mild muscle spasms in the feet, face and hands.
Important parts of this stage are setting a rhythm and pressure which help with enjoyment and therefore enhance the experience.
3, Orgasms – where you reach a relaxed state of enjoyment and pleasure. This is the climax of the sexual response cycle. Only lasting a few seconds in the man and a little longer in the woman, this is the sudden, powerful release of sexual tension.
The blood pressure, heart rate and breathing are all at their highest rates now. We also release muscle contractions in an involuntary fashion. In women, the muscles of the vagina contract and in men the rhythmic contractions of the muscles in the base of the penis result in ejaculation of semen.
4, Resolution Phase – and then we’re done! The warm and cuddly hormones are pumped around the body and then we might hit fatigue. The official term for this is the ‘Resolution’ phase. Some of us lucky girls are capable of a rapid return to arousal with further sexual stimulation leading to multiple orgasms, whereas most men need a recovery time after orgasm.
Either way it all feels good.